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This is what it could look like when one completely deconstructs a life as one knows it, and how to build from the ground up. Alternatively, this is a fresh look at an old story. The fine art of falling apart.

things that knock the breath out

I'm not allowed to smoke in the house, but occasionally I have one since it's freezing outside and I'm cozy in bed watching something. It's some insane hour of the morning. I have been up off and on for the past 8 hours so it's not surprise I'm sitting here twiddling my thumbs like a good monkey.

I spent some time with an old friend for a couple of days, came home yesterday. She really wanted me to go into the city to hear this three man band that was coming in to do a show, then spend the night. She said singer/songwriter and I managed to move some things around on my busy schedule and poof, I was able to make it.

We had a great time the first night. I don't talk so much anymore, I've morphed into a listener. Lots of Gin & Tonic to be had and it was hard to fit all we've missed in each other's lives into a scant 9 hours of straight talking. I tried to introduce her to Matthew Good, she made me look up every little 3 man band she could think of. There is some truly great music out there.

After the band guys arrived it was like a free for all. Two days of travelling fast in a minivan could do that to you, I suppose. In any event, the show was good that night at a little venue in Sudbury. Afterwards (feeling my age) I'm ready to go home, but scads of girls that look (and sound) 14 have gathered about the guys. I can see where this is going, having spent too much time with friends backstage at one show or another. I'm older now, so I'm used to people talking and such, not the screaming groupies I encountered the other night. Then they somehow managed to come back with us. I had to listen to the sound of chirping and screeching girls all evening.

The whole thing was just a rewind of past shows.

Down to the last wire for submitting my application to the university.
And another one disappoints me. I really have to lower my expectations of people. Some aren't made to give.

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